start of a new beginning

I don't know why I got one of these. I guess I just wanted something new...when everything else in my life is old. I'm jobless, still living with my mom, all my stuff still in Alabama. I'm just bored of this. I wish I was still working at Fujifilm. The work was good. The pay was good. Even the workers were good. How am I gonna find something like that again? I could go back in the fall, when things pick up there again, but what do I do until then? I need a job. I need to get out of here. Christopher and I need to find an apartment soon. We're both going crazy. His mom drives him nuts and not having my own stuff drives me nuts. I hate to regret, but man...was I stupid? To get married at nineteen, move all my shit down to Alabama, then leave everything there when things get rough. I'm not saying I should have stayed there...I'm just saying I should have thought things through and know that he wouldn't have come through for me. Why should I trust him anymore? I should have did things on my own and just brought everything back with me when I could. I can't let people tell me what to do anymore. I just have to think for myself and do it on my own. I won't get anywhere with letting people do it for me.


So this is me...I'm not sure if I like it yet or not...but I'm trying to.